standing at the center of the picture of his joy

Filling page after page with half-thoughts is both an affront to writing and essential to the practice of it. It takes time to cook up something good, and sometimes we have it, sometimes we don’t. What spooks me is a certain flatness, apathy, lethargy, whereby the impulse to pursue an idea or sensation or line of thinking is weak, and the corresponding motivation to slide down another rabbit hole is almost nonexistent. Some, surely, would call this “depression,” and though I might be inclined to debate, I would not go so far as to deny the applicability of that term. I try so hard to choose happiness, I’d protest, every moment of every fucking day I try to choose it like it’s the daily fucking chef’s special but I sometimes fail to see how it stands out from the rest of the menu and order a perturbation omelette and a coffee and wait for inspiration to return from wherever it goes when I go missing.

2 thoughts on “standing at the center of the picture of his joy

  1. They keep saying loneliness or sadness or melancholy or whatever is a beautiful part of the human experience I’ve come to believe it 🙂 . One thing is undisputed, though: life is constant struggle.
    You needn’t scribble anything here if you don’t feel like it. Take your sweet time. Enjoy your new surroundings outside. Simply knowing you’re around makes me glad. No matter what, you’ll always be my dearest co-blogger. ❤

    Hope you are at least doing okay at your new job, M.

    P.S. Your long titles are captivating.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much for these kind words, and for your support. You are right, life is constant struggle. It’s up to each of us to make it worthwhile.

      I’m glad you’re enjoying the long titles. I’m preferring them these days.

      Liked by 1 person

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About mischa

I write things about stuff, and sometimes stuff about things. Depends on the day.